We’ve already explained why sexual fantasies are good for the brain, but what exactly are those fantasies that really get people going?
To each their own, of course, but it turns out there are certain things that we tend conjure in our imaginations more often than others. In doing research for his book, Tell Me What You Want, Dr. Justin Lehmiller surveyed more than 4,000 people in the United States about their sexual fantasies, and found that seven things, in particular, kept coming up. So what are we dirty daydreaming about?
1. Multipartner sex (like threesomes and orgies)
2. Power, control, and rough sex (like BDSM)
3. Changing things up—for example, having sex with someone different (if you’re in a relationship), or having sex in an unusual place
4. Taboo or forbidden circumstances, like having sex in public
5. Open relationships
6. Passion and romance—ie, meaningful sex that makes you feel desired
7. Same-sex encounters, gender-bending and erotic flexibility
By highlighting these fantasies, Lehmiller hopes to help reduce the stigma around sex and encourage people to be more open and comfortable talking about it in general.Read more about the most common sexual fantasies.