Everything you need to know before getting it on whilst bathing.
Like with app dates and probably Timothee Chalamet, shower sex—while enormously sultry in theory—can often, umm, fall short.
Yeah, it’s hot. It’s steamy. You’re naked. Water is cascading. But alongside all the more illustrious parts of intercourse-avec-bathing, there are some minor inconveniences: It’s slippery, vaguely cramped, difficult to lather up (if cleaning your body was, at any point, the intention here), and it’s likely that you’ll find yourself with several unsolicited mouthfuls of lukewarm water. Unlike intimate moments in the bedroom (or even on the floor or sofa), sex in the shower comes with a lot more logistical questions than you might be prepared for. What sounds like an amazing idea can end up being disappointing—or, at worst, dangerous enough to merit a trip to urgent care.
Nonetheless, there is a time and a place for shower sex. And when duty calls, you must answer. So in the hopes of making your next occasion for bathroom boning as pleasurable as possible, we’ve put together a guide for the slippery when wet moments, including the best shower sex positions that can make your slippery-when-wet moments even better. Shower sex can be safe, fun, and even exciting—and taking the right steps beforehand can help ensure that all parties have squeaky clean fun.
This should go without saying, but just in case it doesn’t: If you’re going to have sex in the shower, for the love of whatever spiritual deity or cosmic force you look up to, make sure you clean it ahead of time. Nothing kills the mood like grout that hasn’t seen the surface of a sponge in weeks and errant hairs, even if they are arranged almost artistically on your tiles. And perish the thought of a clogged drain that forces dirty water to fill your tub. You can even consider shower sex a motivating factor to inspire you to deep-clean that bathroom.
Beyond the scrubbing, a bit of decluttering helps, too. You want to have as much room as possible in your shower or bath, so place shampoos, soaps, and all other bathroom accouterments to the side. If you want to set the moment, prep your space with nice, fluffy towels, and maybe even some candles. Who says the bathroom can’t be intimate?
Now, you might be asking, “Is it safe to have sex in the shower?” It certainly can be, but you do have to be careful. There’s less risk of slipping in a tiled shower—one perk for those who might not have a full tub—which makes them the best spot for shower sex. But tubs are fair game, too. One safety consideration: If your tub has a slippery bottom, consider purchasing a non-slip tub mat to reduce any risk of falling.
You’ll also want to be careful with what you grab onto; that shower rod may not be as secure as you think it is. Try shower sex positions that don’t require you to hold onto anything that can fall or break, lest you get hurt or cause some pricey damage.
Skip the soap
If you’re actually in the shower to, well, shower, we highly recommend waiting until after the sex to reach for the soap. For the sake of your safety, you don’t want to add more slippery agents to the mix here. Plus, vying for shared water flow whilst soaping up your armpits isn’t exactly the best way to kick off your romp.
Unlike with bedside doggy style, you may need to do a little extra work to ground yourself and keep your balance. Make a point to hold onto some (firmly attached) fixture in the tub while you’re going at it, and if need be, consider a horizontal position.
Try shower-friendly sex positions
Limited space, free-flowing water, and slippery ceramic tiles can make shower sex a far more complicated ordeal than expected. When standby positions like doggy and missionary aren’t on the table, you’ll have to consider some more creative ways to have sex in the shower. The good news is: You have several options that are both fun and can be safe when done correctly. Here are some of the best sex positions in the shower to try.
One leg wrapped
One partner keeps their back against the shower wall, while the other faces them. The partner closer to the wall wraps their arms and one leg around the other person to stabilize themselves, while the one facing them places their hands on the wall behind them.
You likely won’t have enough space in your tub for cowgirl, but a slightly constricted version works perfectly well. One partner sits on the floor of the tub or shower with their legs bent, while the other partner rides them.
Prefer some backwards action? The above position works just as well with the partner on top facing backwards. Which way the two of you face will depend on how (literally) wet you want to get. If you’re not into having a spray of water directly in your face, have the bottom partner sit against the wall with the shower faucet
Not sure how to have sex in the shower? This one’s fairly simple. With both partners facing away from the spray of the shower, one stands closer to the wall and plants their hands firmly against it, arching their back while the other stands behind them, holding their hips.
If you’re feeling daring, one partner can also lift the other one off the floor completely—that partner should firmly wrap their legs around the other and hold on tight. You don’t even have to have sex in this position—making out (a la The Notebook) can be just as satisfying.
Keep that water warm
Few things are bigger boner killers (speaking in the gender neutral sense) than the cold. And shower heads can only go so far. So do your best to keep that water hot enough to steam up the whole space—leaving whoever isn’t in the shower’s central line of attack toasty and warm.
Don’t rule out oral
Penetrative sex isn’t the only way to have fun in the shower. Take turns giving kneeling oral, while one of you keeps your back to the water. This way, you’ll each get your moment to enjoy the shower pressure, and to pleasure your partner uninhibited by mouthfuls of hot water.
By nature, the shower keeps things pretty...clean. So feel free to use your shower sex as an opportunity to indulge some of your messier modes of fornication. Use the shower for bloody period sex, lube-heavy anal, or maybe, as a smart way to compensate for all the sweat if, say, you’re boning in 90-degree-heat sans A/C.
Bring in some toys
Using a vibrator with a partner is a great way to mix things up, and water-resistant toys are totally fair game in the shower, too. You can use a vibrator during foreplay, or get it involved throughout your shower session.
Experiment a little
The first time you have shower sex with your partner (or anytime you have shower sex, for that matter) may not go according to plan. Instead, a bit of trial and error may be necessary for you both to figure out what works, not only in your space, but with your preferences. Take safety precautions, but don’t take shower sex too seriously—it’s meant to be fun.
You need not finish
The thing about shower sex is: it’s hot either way. You don’t need to carry it out to completion for it to have been a worthwhile endeavor for the both of you. If it’s slippery, you’re cramping, and you’re feeling a bit water-logged, enjoy the foreplay, then towel off (or don’t) and finish elsewhere.