As a part of our maudern people campaign, we asked New York based-founder and mom Jina Kim for insights on modern intimacy in a time of mandated isolation.
What is your relationship status?
Married—we’ve been together 13 years, married for 6 of them.
With social distancing & quarantine, how has human contact changed for you?
As this period of quarantine continues, I realize how much I love and need human contact. In the first few weeks of social distancing, I really valued the quiet and reveled in being in a bubble—especially grateful to be able to stay home and spend time with my husband and little toddler. As the weeks progress, I’m really missing the company and companionship of my friends and even the strangers I encounter every day in NYC. I’ve been filling the void with tons of facetime and zoom dates.
We are both constantly in work or parent mode so finding intimacy for just the two of us can be a bit challenging. But we’ve been making the effort to “turn off” and just enjoy one another without the distractions of work.
How do you make time for intimacy?
We are both constantly in work or parent mode so finding intimacy for just the two of us can be a bit challenging. But we’ve been making the effort to “turn off” and just enjoy one another without the distractions of work. Simple things like a quiet dinner or watching a movie after our son goes to bed go a long way. Also, having a toddler in the house means we need to find moments of intimacy as a family of 3. We’ve really cherished walks through Prospect Park and just being in each other’s presence fully.
How has your perspective on your home/space changed?
Previously, home has always been an “escape” from work. It was so simple to separate the two spaces. Working from home, it’s become easier to fall into the trip of working 24/7; so work, being a wife, being a mom all bleed into each other. It’s been a challenge to juggle everything and have a comfortable work-life balance. I’ve been remedying this by being more disciplined about separating spaces at home where work-brain is not allowed like the dining table, bathroom and bedroom—all of which have become a place of refuge.
How do you keep busy? Do you separate the weekend and weekdays?
Honestly, the days have been flying by. Between work and mom-hood, there just doesn’t seem to be enough time in a day to get everything done. Weekdays are usually pretty regimented and we’ve developed somewhat of a routine to help balance and manage our schedules, often taking turns between meetings to take care of our child. Weekends, we’ve really embraced just spending time as a family. Cooking fun meals, taking walks, and just enjoying each other’s company has really provided a sense of normalcy in the midst of uncertainty.
What is a new activity you are planning to try?
We’ve really enjoyed learning to cook together as a family. We’re always looking to get creative with new recipes and try to expose our son to all kinds of fun foods. I’ve also been making myself a drink in the evenings. The anticipation and routine of opening a bottle of wine or mixing myself a drink has been very comforting.
Do you have a book or movie on your list while home?
I’ve been finding comfort in rewatching some of my old favorites. My Netflix list has definitely grown quite a bit but my go-to’s have been 90’s action movies and rom-coms—nothing like a little nostalgia to bring some comfort.