As a part of our maudern people series, we asked Detroit-based creative Amber Lewis for insights on modern intimacy. Amber, known as the Detroit Gem, is a social media and content savant.
What is your relationship status?
Single, enjoying my freedom and self. In a space where I’m filled by my relationships.
In your day to day life, how do you make time for intimacy?I make time for intimacy in my day to day life by being present with myself. Through mediation, through journaling, through music, through art, through language. Through nonverbal communication like dance and aromatherapy accompanied by candlelight. Through my skincare routine and expressing gratitude. Through writing poetry and doing the work of breaking generational curses. There are no boundaries to the art of my intimacy.
You feel the most loved when ____I feel the most loved when the sun is shining. I feel the most loved through thoughtfulness and intentionality. When I’m with loved ones or loving on myself.
How do you meet people?I meet people at events, on social media and other apps, through mutual friends.
What is your stance on dating apps? What is a turn-off or something you look for?I’m down for dating apps, I see more success on them when I’m traveling. I look for quality photos.
A favorite literary or on-screen romance: Right now, The Photograph sticks out. Not sure if I’d called it a favorite, it’s hard to find examples of Black love in literature or film that doesn’t showcase trauma, pain, or harm.
Being thoughtful and useful.
The perfect date:
All-day; both thoughtful and spontaneous.
Your in the mood food:
Brunch; more savory than sweet.
Drink of choice:
Bourbon. A Kentucky mule.
A sexy or intimate song you love:
Inside My Love by Minnie Riperton & Ooh Nah Nah by Sir ft. Masego
Dating advice to your younger self:
Understand and communicate what you need, your intuition is right, let what you know about love lead you while learning love.
What your parents said about love and relationships:
My dad would always say the Maya Angelou quote when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.
Right now it's a blend of oakmoss + amber.